Thursday, June 12, 2014
About a year ago the s*** really hit the fan. Then came my descent into distress, illness and grave pain. A year has passed and I am much better. And now I find myself at one of those moments where I feel I have reached a fork in the road.
Today I learned of an employment opportunity back in Monterey, California. I lived in Monterey while attending graduate school between 2009 and 2011. The opportunity is with an organization founded by a school colleague. I didn't know him well while I attended school but we did chat on more than one occasion. I have a good impression of him. He recently was working for the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration. I gave my time for free to NOAA in 2010 and again in 2012. I did so partly in the hope that my generosity would lead to a career. It didn't. Now I am two years older and two years (somewhat) wiser. A lot has changed! And my intervening experience has further informed my outlook.
Today, while working my position at Abbott Northwestern Hospital, I tried to imagine myself again living in the Monterey Bay area. There are aspects to the place that are amazing. Big Sur is nearby. San Francisco is just a two hour drive away. And of course California itself is an amazing place. But since I left the state in early 2011 California has continued to suffer through drought. It's made headlines in newspapers across the country...at least in the bigger city newspapers. It's been so dry that I shudder to think what the forest fire season will be like in a few months. I don't much savor the idea of smoke in the air.
Then there is the matter of the demographics of the Monterey Bay area. The demographics aren't exactly pleasing to my sense of what will fulfill my needs. It can be a lonely place for a gay man. I remember it was when I lived there. But at least you're not likely to meet people in that immediate area who are as vociferous about the apparent merits of stoning gay people to death as a certain political candidate in Oklahoma was noted to be recently. Predictable, quiet oceanside communities have their charms. But they can also be extraordinarily insular.
Here is one argument in favor of taking a job there if it was offered to me. I could see California again with eyes no longer still subtly clouded by trauma. I would be seeing the state all over again...but it would appear differently to me. I have no doubt about that. But there are many other beautiful places in the world to see outside of California.
I've had so many disappointments and discouraging experiences in the last three years that I have become much more mindful in regards to my own health and needs. One unfortunate reality of the job in question is that it would not offer me any health insurance were I to become an employee. I value my health insurance greatly. To lose it at this exact moment in my life would be a risk I do not feel would be wise to take.
Next week I will learn of the status of my application for vocational rehabilitation benefits. I will also speak with the Executive Director of the Foxfire Institute in Berlin, Germany. I suspect the best path for my future is going to become much more intelligible in the next few weeks.
About a year ago the s*** really hit the fan. Then came my descent into distress, illness and grave pain. A year has passed and I am much better. And now I find myself at one of those moments where I feel I have reached a fork in the road.
Today I learned of an employment opportunity back in Monterey, California. I lived in Monterey while attending graduate school between 2009 and 2011. The opportunity is with an organization founded by a school colleague. I didn't know him well while I attended school but we did chat on more than one occasion. I have a good impression of him. He recently was working for the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration. I gave my time for free to NOAA in 2010 and again in 2012. I did so partly in the hope that my generosity would lead to a career. It didn't. Now I am two years older and two years (somewhat) wiser. A lot has changed! And my intervening experience has further informed my outlook.
Today, while working my position at Abbott Northwestern Hospital, I tried to imagine myself again living in the Monterey Bay area. There are aspects to the place that are amazing. Big Sur is nearby. San Francisco is just a two hour drive away. And of course California itself is an amazing place. But since I left the state in early 2011 California has continued to suffer through drought. It's made headlines in newspapers across the country...at least in the bigger city newspapers. It's been so dry that I shudder to think what the forest fire season will be like in a few months. I don't much savor the idea of smoke in the air.
Then there is the matter of the demographics of the Monterey Bay area. The demographics aren't exactly pleasing to my sense of what will fulfill my needs. It can be a lonely place for a gay man. I remember it was when I lived there. But at least you're not likely to meet people in that immediate area who are as vociferous about the apparent merits of stoning gay people to death as a certain political candidate in Oklahoma was noted to be recently. Predictable, quiet oceanside communities have their charms. But they can also be extraordinarily insular.
Here is one argument in favor of taking a job there if it was offered to me. I could see California again with eyes no longer still subtly clouded by trauma. I would be seeing the state all over again...but it would appear differently to me. I have no doubt about that. But there are many other beautiful places in the world to see outside of California.
I've had so many disappointments and discouraging experiences in the last three years that I have become much more mindful in regards to my own health and needs. One unfortunate reality of the job in question is that it would not offer me any health insurance were I to become an employee. I value my health insurance greatly. To lose it at this exact moment in my life would be a risk I do not feel would be wise to take.
Next week I will learn of the status of my application for vocational rehabilitation benefits. I will also speak with the Executive Director of the Foxfire Institute in Berlin, Germany. I suspect the best path for my future is going to become much more intelligible in the next few weeks.
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