Saturday, July 19, 2014
At some point today I felt this feeling deep in the very fiber of my being that I cannot recall feeling so fully since I embarked on this journey of writing this blog a little over a year ago. I felt this soft, tender, warm conviction that there is indeed life after trauma...and that there can and will be joy and happiness in my own life in the future. Trauma can permanently change us and the courses of our future lives but that doesn't mean we won't live, laugh and love in the future.
The choices I made today were healthy choices and therein lies the rub. Health and love are within my reach. I need only believe in the possibility of healing and in the power of the choices I am making. The rest can unfold naturally without any obsessive pushing of the flow of life on my part.
I first met with the chiropractor and shamanic practitioner I first met last November. I met her at the Germanic American Institute in St. Paul for some coffee and cake. It was nice to be amidst others who speak German. Mary and I had an engaging conversation. It was a pleasure to relax, enjoy good food and dream of creative possibilities of collaboration.
I next went to All God's Children Metropolitan Community Church for a writing workshop focused on the local community of LGBT people in recovery. It was gratifying to see others focused on their own wellness turn out for the workshop. It was a joy to see others commit to self-exploration with the power of writing. Yes, there are indeed others out there who are committed to their own wellness. These people exist. I have met many of them all over the country and world. They are everywhere. Healthy, happy people are indeed everywhere to be found. I have the power to choose to find them.
I finally went to visit with the psychologist I have been consulting with throughout this month. It was nice to again spend time in the presence of someone committed to health and wellness. Again, there are people committed to wellness to be found out in the world. But you have to put yourself out there to find them.
I saw the sun low in the western sky this evening. It was a deep pinkish red color. It seemed to flirt with the clouds. It peeked in and out more than once. I appreciated the greenery of the world.
I survived all the difficult times of my childhood. Despite the hardship, emotional turmoil, failings of my past caregivers and destructive violence I reached my adulthood. Yes, I have some psychic scars but I did not die. I am still here. And I have immense strength that I can draw upon. Each and every moment you and I are creating our individual futures. And together we can create a better collective future. I am here now in this present moment...seeing myself type on my computer and smiling as I contemplate my resilience and dedication.
Cheers!
At some point today I felt this feeling deep in the very fiber of my being that I cannot recall feeling so fully since I embarked on this journey of writing this blog a little over a year ago. I felt this soft, tender, warm conviction that there is indeed life after trauma...and that there can and will be joy and happiness in my own life in the future. Trauma can permanently change us and the courses of our future lives but that doesn't mean we won't live, laugh and love in the future.
The choices I made today were healthy choices and therein lies the rub. Health and love are within my reach. I need only believe in the possibility of healing and in the power of the choices I am making. The rest can unfold naturally without any obsessive pushing of the flow of life on my part.
I first met with the chiropractor and shamanic practitioner I first met last November. I met her at the Germanic American Institute in St. Paul for some coffee and cake. It was nice to be amidst others who speak German. Mary and I had an engaging conversation. It was a pleasure to relax, enjoy good food and dream of creative possibilities of collaboration.
I next went to All God's Children Metropolitan Community Church for a writing workshop focused on the local community of LGBT people in recovery. It was gratifying to see others focused on their own wellness turn out for the workshop. It was a joy to see others commit to self-exploration with the power of writing. Yes, there are indeed others out there who are committed to their own wellness. These people exist. I have met many of them all over the country and world. They are everywhere. Healthy, happy people are indeed everywhere to be found. I have the power to choose to find them.
I finally went to visit with the psychologist I have been consulting with throughout this month. It was nice to again spend time in the presence of someone committed to health and wellness. Again, there are people committed to wellness to be found out in the world. But you have to put yourself out there to find them.
I saw the sun low in the western sky this evening. It was a deep pinkish red color. It seemed to flirt with the clouds. It peeked in and out more than once. I appreciated the greenery of the world.
I survived all the difficult times of my childhood. Despite the hardship, emotional turmoil, failings of my past caregivers and destructive violence I reached my adulthood. Yes, I have some psychic scars but I did not die. I am still here. And I have immense strength that I can draw upon. Each and every moment you and I are creating our individual futures. And together we can create a better collective future. I am here now in this present moment...seeing myself type on my computer and smiling as I contemplate my resilience and dedication.
Cheers!
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I invite you to accompany me as I document my own journey of healing. My blog is designed to offer inspiration and solace to others. If you find it of value I welcome you to share it with others. Aloha!