Tuesday, November 4, 2014

Eventually...You Have To Move On

Tuesday, November 4, 2014

Certain moments in life can be suddenly catalytic.  Sometimes these moments are debilitating or disabling.  Other times we may experience something profoundly inspiring, unusual or beautiful.  Such moments can unexpectedly call forth the fullness of our very selves to be present in that moment.  We might even find a whole way of life falling by the wayside.  With the twenty-five year anniversary of the Berlin Wall’s fall arriving this coming Sunday I have been reflecting on catalytic moments that forever change individual lives as well as whole societies.

I feel as if I reached the point of no return recently in regards to my own earlier life history.  The story you carry about your own life is only as powerful as the power you give it.  If you want to begin living a new life story you must first consciously choose to move in a new direction.  Then you actually do the work of taking the step.

This last Sunday I attended a discussion on the subject of end of life care and related issues.  The presentation was held at the Basilica of St. Mary.  I sat down with the deacon who gave the presentation after it had ended.  In the privacy of a room I had never been in before I recounted some of the salient details of my own life history.  And as I made my recounting I could feel myself growing weary of the experience of retelling what I have experienced.  I do not believe in living my life with the burden of a victim mentality.  I do believe in getting to the heart of my issues, working through them and then, finally, moving on.  You can only grieve so long and feel so much sadness before the natural process of attrition sets in.  And once grieving has been fully done deep renewal of self can take the place that sadness and pain once occupied.

I still feel that I am grieving.  But the nature of my grief is changing.  It’s leaden weight no longer feels quite so burdensome.  I am focusing more and more on what good I can still experience and bring to the world once my grieving process is fully complete.

Post Script

Fifty Day Challenge, Day #40:

  • I exercised at the YMCA
  • I met with my therapist and had what proved to be a very productive session
  • I attended a presentation offered by Catherine Byers Breet to turbo-charge my networking activities

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I invite you to accompany me as I document my own journey of healing. My blog is designed to offer inspiration and solace to others. If you find it of value I welcome you to share it with others. Aloha!