Friday, November 27, 2015

Being Healthy...Every Day

Friday, November 27, 2015

The world of retail calls today Black Friday. I personally enjoyed a Relaxed Friday. It was a great gift to have very little to do today. I feel fortunate to have several days in a row off so I can take some time to recharge. The holidays are often not an easy time for me. I can easily find myself thinking about my family of origin. And soon I might find myself spiraling down into a deep (though temporary) funk when I bring to mind the reality that I am not on speaking terms with my paternal family of origin.

Nearly two and a half years have passed since "all hell broke loose" in my life in 2013. I put that phrase in quotes because it has such a dramatic ring to it. Though that time in my life was indeed horrible there was never anything (to my knowledge) that happened during that time that was life threatening. I was miserable for quite a while due to the fact that I had placed my trust in a number of people...and then I learned, in rather quick succession, that several people I had trusted were not at all trustworthy.

Stress and fear can bring out the worst in people. I believe you can often learn a lot more about who people truly are when they are stressed and enduring immense loss as compared to when their lives are filled with joy and contentment. The good times make for smooth sailing in life. It's the dark storm clouds of chaos and pain that overwhelm many people. It is easy to begin living in survival mode when stress and suffering persist over a long period of time.

Recovery from trauma is a process. I have commented on this elsewhere in my blog. In this regard trauma recovery is not unlike recovery from other challenges that life may present us. Challenges such as financial setbacks, physical health issues and catastrophic events (such as losing your home in a fire) all may often require us to diligently work to recover. Such recovery work will require us to commit some amount of time so that we may ultimately overcome such difficulties. Lasting recovery may thus prove especially challenging for those who do not come by patience easily. Discerning a realistic ending in a journey of trauma recovery may prove quite difficult when you first embark on such a journey. I know this from my own personal experience. It is no coincidence that my own blog references the word 'odyssey' in the title. I have often felt as if I have been on a journey of healing for a very long time!

I now generally feel as if I am living a fairly healthy life on a daily basis. There are still some moments when I find myself ruminating on old hurts and disappointments. There are days when I feel very unmotivated and even deeply pessimistic about the likelihood that I will one day achieve those big, amazing dreams we all supposedly have for our individual lives. Some days I feel as if my very ancient grief (which first appeared in my childhood when I nearly lost both of my biological parents by the age of nine) still has immense power to distort my view of the world around me. But thankfully these issues continue to wane with time. The trend line of my life continues to point up. I feel optimistic about my prospects for my future.

The world at large is another matter. With some individuals drawing comparisons between one of our current supposedly credible GOP contenders for the 2016 Presidential election ("The Donald") and Adolf Hitler it's not at all surprising that some people would feel depressed about the state of affairs throughout the world. Chaos seems to reign in many parts of the world. The potential long term consequences of an Islamic State continuing to undermine the stability of Africa, Europe and the Middle East are too horrifying to easily contemplate. Meanwhile the Pacific Basin is experiencing a monstrous El Nino which may easily set records during this upcoming winter. It doesn't appear we are going to do anything genuinely significant about human induced climate change until catastrophic disruption of the global climate is not only upon us but largely irreversible.

When pondering the world at large I try to take pause when I find myself feeling deeply pessimistic. Given my own life history it can be difficult to clearly identify what portion of my pessimism is attributable to the trauma I endured as a child and what portion is a healthy and proportionate response to what I witness occurring in the world around me.

There is only so much that one person can do in the world. I am deeply aware of that given my current professional commitment. And yet I nonetheless believe that we could successfully address the biggest problems of the world if we would bring more courage, creativity and determination to bear to seeking solutions to those problems.

The world needs more love rather than more money. We need people committed to living lives of open-heartedness.

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I invite you to accompany me as I document my own journey of healing. My blog is designed to offer inspiration and solace to others. If you find it of value I welcome you to share it with others. Aloha!