Wednesday, August 19, 2015

That Moment of Imminent Departure

Wednesday, August 19, 2015

I discovered a website today that allowed me to take many mental excursions to the distant past. By that I mean I found a website that allows me to look up background information on any individual I want to learn more about. All I need is sufficient information (a name and location) and this site can look up any number of aspects of a person's background including information about address and employment history, criminal records and so on. It's actually a bit surreal how much information can now be easily found using a simple website. The days of easily separating your private and public lives are long gone.

I actually managed to (supposedly) find the current address and phone number of a boyfriend I had twenty years ago. Yes...twenty years ago. I am debating calling him just to tell him I harbor no difficult feelings about our history together. Our relationship did not end well. He tried to commit suicide after we had gone our separate ways. He then later attempted to heap blame on me for the state of mind he was in at the time that led him to nearly kill himself. It wasn't a pretty time.

Looking up people who were significant to me in my distant past was a bit of a surreal exercise. It only more firmly convinced me that I need to live in the present moment, leave all the pain behind me and reach for a much more dazzling future that really and truly can (still) be mine...if only I will reach for it.

As the last days of summer arrive and pass by and I contemplate the coming of autumn I feel myself finally feeling really to embrace the amazing possibilities that can still be in my future.

It's time to move on.

Really and's time to move on.

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